October 20, 2012

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When honesty brings you into a whole new truth. I do nothing but realize it.

It has been a wonderful 5 years since i know you. I thought 5 years is enough to know you, real you.
It's a long time but not quite enough. And now i feel like i know nothing about you at all.

It's been years of smiles, laughs, yells, screams, journeys, happiness, sadness, angers, jokes, until i feel like you are almost my whole world. I gave you too much. Too much attention, story, too much 'that 4 letters' until i think you know me better than my self.

It's not only because of the distance. But surely that it began when the distance took over us.

You said that you were afraid I would change because of time and distance. I feared the same way like yours. And now i regret that you are the one who eventually changed.

I should not believe of this puppy love since the beginning. I'm just a teenager whatsoever. But you, you also give me too much until i cant even forgive you, even my self.

It is sad how you've changed over time. How time could change you into a real different person.  

It's sad how i considered you almost my world but you thought i was a little part of yours. 

It's sad how i'm not supposed to be sad, but instead i cried.


I dont regret our hello, neither does our goodbye. But i just never thought before that this time could be this hard. Not because i didnt expect it before, but because right now, right now i'm dealing with something i hardly hold and you used to be there to raise me up. 

I dont regret our hello, neither does our goodbye. Because i dont believe in goodbye. It's just a simpler way to say "We have changed and we cant handle it right now. So, see you when we're matured, and strong enough to face that we are a completely different persons than we used to know."

It's silly to see my self like this because of one thing. I should never believe in this puppy love. 

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